You are in transition from the known to the unknown, but there is still a part of you that wants it to be clear, wants it to feel good, and wants some resolution to all of the contradictory thoughts, feelings, and emotions. This longing to return to the known is very natural, and can be held and allowed residence in the wholeness that you are. Nothing need be discarded. All is path.
You are in the midst of the process of death and rebirth. So much has fallen away – so much that you thought you needed, so many of the identities you thought you had to maintain, so much of that which is less than whole within you. The “death” aspect of the journey is being made clear, but what about rebirth? You have no idea what is coming next, what will be reborn in the ashes of that which has been taken from you. There is so much energy here in this unresolved place. You are being asked to sit in the fire of groundlessness, and to stay committed to complexity, confusion, and contradiction. You are being asked to let go of the need to resolve something, to wrap it all up, and to spin back into the known. You are being asked to burn more.
What you do know, for certain, is that *everything* that has yet to be resolved within you is coming on display, is being presented to you in peaceful and wrathful appearances, crying out for integration. Your deeply rooted belief in your own unlovability, your terror of intimacy, your fear of dependency, your failures as a “spiritual” person, and your hesitation to move into the scary places – each of these portals is being opened, and you are being invited in. But you are not yet being shown what’s on the other side.
Wherever you look, the beloved is there – calling you home, inviting more and more awareness, taking you into your burning and not away from it, revealing to you the most radical truth of this dimension: Everything here is path. You need not discard anything. See through the old belief that there is an obstacle or something obscuring your unfolding and illumination.
Yes, it may appear that your fear is working against you, that your sensitivity has taken the other side, that your aloneness is in the way, and that your confusion must be turned into clarity. But inside the palace that is your own body, the beloved and her emissaries are seeding your entire sensory world with their energies and their illumined qualities. They are using particles of love to open and close parts of you, to flood you with consciousness, and to re-orient you to wholeness.
The beloved is a shape-shifter, and will use the entirety of the relative world to reach you, to open you, and to enfold her vision into your cellular reality. She is preparing the ground for what is next. But what is next is always and forever made of the unknown. Stay there.